Me and You in 2013

"One of the things I think that same-sex marriage has to teach straight people is about the possibility of a totally equal and mutual relationship. Handing the bride over to the groom: The vows in the prayer book, up until 1928, were love, honor, and obey for the woman. As much as we've tried to revise our marriage service to make everything equal and mutual, it still has with it some connotations and vestiges of premodern ways of understanding male-female relationships. I think one of the ways in which gay and lesbian couples really can teach something to straight couples is the way in which they hold up the possibility of an absolute equality and mutuality in marriage." - The Very Rev. Gary Hall

I stumbled upon this quote in a Savage Love column (go read it!) and it got me thinking. Before we got engaged I considered waiting to get married until everyone can get married but it struck me as an empty gesture -- something celebrities or people in the public eye do. Seeing that we are neither, it made more sense to me to make our marriage ceremony meaningful by including the following passage from Goodridge v. Department of Public Health (aka the ruling that made marriage equal for all couples in Massachusetts):

"Marriage is a vital social institution. The exclusive commitment of two individuals to each other nurtures love and mutual support. Civil marriage is at once a deeply personal commitment to another human being and a highly public celebration of the ideals of mutuality, companionship, intimacy, fidelity, and family. Because it fulfils yearnings for security, safe haven, and connection that express our common humanity, civil marriage is an esteemed institution and the decision whether and whom to marry is among life's momentous acts of self-definition. It is undoubtedly for these concrete reasons, as well as for its intimately personal significance, that civil marriage has long been termed a "civil right." Without the right to choose to marry one is excluded from the full range of human experience."

After including it in our September 2011 nuptials, the passage has become a popular alternative wedding reading (thankyouverymuch New York Magazine). Coupled with the fact that recent polls show 53% of Americans support same-sex marriage, it's just a matter of time before this arbitrary law becomes as obsolete as anti-miscegenation laws (a law my parents would have violated if they had been married 14 years earlier). Since the dawn of time, people in love have defined what "me and you" means. I just hope that this year it means equal rights for "me" and "you."

Quarter Life Reassessment

“Do you know that part on your resume where they ask if you have any special skills? Well, it's the thing where they ask you to list like, 'yoga, Spanish, water skiing, Photoshop.' I feel like I don’t I have any special skills." - Hannah Horvath

It's time to develop some skills.

I went off to college with the grand idea of being a film critic for the San Francisco Chronicle. (Nevermind that I was making this decision right as print journalism was about to implode.) Four years, tens of thousands of dollars and one bachelor's degree later, I took the route taken by most recent college graduates with a communications degree. I took a marketing job.

While marketing was never my first calling or even my second (Rolling Stone journalist/Woodstock attendee/Hunter S. Thompson groupie, 1969-1975) or third (bookstore/bar owner), I have grown to appreciate my stumbled upon profession. In addition to paying the bills, marketing has allowed me to express my creative inklings and explore my love of technology which brings us to the point of this post.

I've dabbled with HTML and CSS for the past two years, first with our now defunct wedding website and currently with my company's website, with varying degrees of success. This winter I decided to take my hobby to the next level and enrolled in The Starter League's HTML5 & CSS3 class.

Unlike a community college course or online tutorial, the folks at The Starter League believe in a collaborative and passionate learning environment where egos are left at the door and questions are encouraged. This was most evident at the student orientation where groups of six were asked to build the tallest freestanding structure with dry spaghetti noodles, string, tape, and a marshmallow. Our structure wasn't too successful (see top photo) but the exercise (borrowed from a TED Talk) challenged us to be curious, persistent and open -- characteristics I know I'll need to get through this class...and life.

The 10-week class ends in March and while I can't say that it will turn me into a front-end developer, I can say that it will make me think differently about day-to-day challenges and perhaps give me something to put in the "special skills" portion of my resume.

Photo via The Starter League

By the Numbers

"They" say life is what happens when you're making plans. 491 days of marriage, 3 international flights, countless restaurant visits and too many cocktails later, life is what happened when we were busy buying travel guides and making reservations.

Birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, and trips are well documented. It's the daily comings and goings that you forget about only to remember when you make a well-loved recipe, visit a former haunt or find an old note. This blog will document the exciting, the everyday and the random musings of the MWs as they swill bourbon and gin, experiment with their grill (in Chicago winters no less!), roam around the world, and explore the wonders of their "backyard." We hope you join us on this journey!

Photo by Malia Rae Photography